50 Days of Affirmations

We know our truth, but sometimes we need someone else to exclaim, "Girl, you're amazing!"  A couple of years ago, I was inspired by the dynamic life coach and best-selling author, Debbie Ford, who challenged me to join in the Summer Self-Esteem Game.  

Here's how it worked: First, I needed to choose a buddy, someone with whom I felt comfortable sharing my insecurities and fears.  Next, I invited her to join me in a 50-day challenge, where we would text, email, or phone messages that empowered each other to, as Debbie says, "blast through our limitations."  Thus, it was important to choose a buddy with whom I could honestly share those negative thoughts and beliefs that were keeping me from radiating my light.  

My youngest sister said YES to this challenge, and for 50 consecutive days we "blasted" each other with love.  Girl, you can't beat that!  Here are some affirmations that we exchanged: 

*God doesn't make junk.  I am good enough, just as I am. 

*I deserve to live with vast amounts of self-love and joy, beginning today. 

*I am a genius, and the challenge is to uncover the genius within my soul.  

*My ideas and opinions matter, and they reflect the kind and gentle person that I am. 

*I am a Goddess of Possibility.  I inspire others and help them to see that anything is possible.

This was a powerful process for me.  It confirmed my belief that when we open ourselves up to vulnerability, we open ourselves up to deeper relationships and enduring self-love.  This summer, I challenge you to take the plunge and invite someone to be a part of your world.  Play the game.  You can't lose.  I promise.

But please . . .come back and tell us about it!    

P.S. Click HERE for Debbie Ford's free affirmations.  

Dear Nina

A couple of months ago, my brother-in-law's mother, Nina, passed away.  I got the horrifying phone call late one evening.  They said she was dead.  They said it was a massive heart attack. They said she didn't suffer.  I was shocked, numb to the bone.  She was way too young.  And although I didn't have the privilege of knowing her for long, I miss her.  We had a simple, special bond; we are moms.  

Nina touched so many lives as a nurse, educator, and mentor at Rochester General Hospital. Today, on her birthday, the ViaHealth community gathered for a memorial service in her honor.   Although I couldn't be present to celebrate her life, I chose to remember Nina in a way that honored who she was, her legacy as a loving, generous, whole-lotta-fun MOM.  

In a nutshell, Nina was the kind of mom who made snow angels in the winter and snuggled inside cardboard forts on rainy afternoons.  She was there, for everything.  So, on this brilliant April morning, with record-breaking temperatures, I knew exactly how to celebrate Nina's life . . .at the park. 

Dear Nina, 

On this warm, gorgeous April morning, Liza and I went to the park.  We wanted to remember you.  That's what you would have done.  I pushed Liza on the swings.  She flew high, a smile splayed across her face as if to say, "More, Mommy!" We giggled and reached for the sun.  We crawled through tunnels, and scooted our little tushies down the slide.  We strolled around the lake and quacked at the ducks, our voices leaping when they waddled closer.  We lingered and laughed.  We smiled.  We hugged.  We laughed some more.  We wanted to remember you. That's what you would have done.  

They say moms are angels in disguise.  But you, Nina, are an angel with wings.  

Until we meet again, I'll miss you.

Love, 

MJ

It's the Little Things . . .

I lose things . . .a lot.  The other day, I found an old lip gloss that I love, stashed in the pocket of Liza's diaper bag. "Lost and Found" is my life; and now that I'm a mom, more seems to be lost than found, including my marbles.  My sister gave me this gloss over 8 years ago (Way past expiration, I know), and I fell in love with the color and light vanilla scent.   It's called "Cutie Pie" by Bloom.  

I'm pretty low-maintenance- a minimalist, I would say- when it comes to beautifying.  I've had the same beauty routine since age 18, with the exception of additional under-eye concealer (Dark circles, I curse you!).  But a new, juicy lip gloss has the power to make my day.  A bit scary, but true.  I feel invigorated and delicious and fun!    

I'm not in the habit of wearing lipstick these days, mostly because my daughter is often poking at my face, squeezing my nose, tugging at my glasses, or twisting my lips.  But when I stumbled upon my old friend, I wiggled and twisted the wand applicator, determined to soak up every last bit of flirtatious fun.  Even though I wasn't heading out on a hot date, I smeared it on, pursing and smacking my lips.  It was just for me, but even still, it felt good.  So good.  

Makeup does have a shelf life, but I just haven't been able to part with this gloss.  What if I never find one as yummy?  Here's the good news (for me): Bloom still makes "Cutie Pie," and hell, I'm going to treat myself; it's the little things that make life sweet.  

Here are some other things that have the power to make my day: fresh-squeezed lemonade, pedicures, homemade cards, flip-flops, a brilliant sunshine, a great book. 

What little thing (other than your kids) makes your day?  

The Lonely Chalker

As many of you know from my Staycation Report, my family recently spent a memorable afternoon on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.  I failed to mention, however, that right before heading home, I saw something etched onto the blacktop of a school playground, something glaring, scribbled in stark white chalk: 

"I am the most sadust won of all."

My heart sank.  What causes a child to write that?  Does she have a mommy?  Does someone tuck her in at night and scare the monsters away?  Or has someone punctured her optimism and hope?  I wanted to show this child a glorious afternoon (in part to alleviate my own guilt).  To explore shapes and colors in the museum.  To point to pigeons in the park.  To hold her and tell her that there is no one else in the world just like her, that God doesn't make carbon copies.  

Things are not always as they seem.  The Upper West Side is known as a wealthy section of Manhattan.  People have money.  Nanny money.  Memberships to the museum money. Bugaboo stroller money.  It's not my place to assume or judge what this child does or does not have; that's irrelevant.  She is sad.  Clearly, something is missing.  

That day, I was overcome with a range of emotions: joy, discomfort, awe, serenity, confusion.  But when I passed that playground, I felt a sense of loss, the same loss that I felt when I noticed many children accompanied by nannies in the museum.  I felt for all those children who are missing a connection with someone, anyone.  And I felt for all of those parents who aren't present to witness their child's curiosity, amazement, and imaginative play at work.  

Me? I felt lucky.  Damn lucky.  As I pushed my sensible stroller down the block, my cup runneth over with gratitude, for the opportunity to be a mom and the opportunity to witness the boundless joy and wonder radiating from my child.  

This experience didn't ruin my day; it was a reality check and a call to acknowledge the millions of children around the world who are craving love and affection.  And so, that night, as I tucked my daughter into bed, I hugged her just a little bit tighter, an extra squeeze for the "sadust won."

Go Green Expo NYC

Go Green.  Go Recycle.  Go sustainable.  Go solar powered.  Go this, go that.  It's everywhere.  This weekend I checked out the Go Green Expo in NYC, and I'm back to share some of the highlights!  

Did you know that Alka Seltzer cleans toilets?  Or that lemon and hydrogen peroxide are natural alternatives to bleach?  Featured speaker, Julie Edelman of The Accidental Housewife, put an interesting spin on being green.  Here's the good news:  It's about "being green enough," she said.  "Light green."  Okay, I can do that.  Edelman offered some practical, fun advice on greening your cleaning.  I particularly liked her Alka Seltzer jingle: "Plop, plop.  Fizz, fizz.  Away will go the poop and whizz."

LittleChickieWear had adorable 100% organic cotton onesies and tees:

IAGmedia displayed DVDs, CDs, books, and more that teach kids about caring for our environment.  Let's Go Chipper: Into the Great Outdoors was an iParenting Media Award Winner!  

Good Food Gardens displayed a live outdoor garden system that supports healthy, eco-conscious living.  I WANT ONE!  These gardens promote family cooperation and interdependency.  And with access to their own fresh produce, children develop healthy habits for life . . .love it!  

SodaStream distributed free samples for soda and sparkling water lovers.  It was a delicious alternative to the bottles and cans "that are suffocating our planet."  In fact, the average American consumes 600 cans or bottles of soda and sparkling water each year.  SodaStream boasts less sugar and sugar-free options . . .with fizz.  Santa, please add this to my list!  

Baby Food: The Courage to Make Your Own

Expectant mothers have great intentions . . .that die. Reality sets in, and hectic lives necessitate actions you vowed never to take, like feeding your child that strangely orange mac & cheese from a box. You know what I'm talkin' 'bout!

In the beginning, while I wasn't about to boycott the jarred stuff, I had a desire to experiment with homemade baby meals. I was surprised by how quick and easy they were to prepare with my trusty old blender, (Forget the expensive Beaba Babycook from Williams-Sonoma.) and I found a real sense of purpose- to raise a happy, healthy baby with an adventurous little palette.

It's comforting to know that there are alternatives to mass-produced food. Once I garnered the confidence to make my own, I knew that my daughter was gobbling up the freshest, most nutrient-rich foods possible. "The jarring process necessitates the use of very high heat under pressure, much more than you can generate when cooking at home. Unfortunately, many vitamins are destroyed by heat," says Lisa Barnes, founder of Petit Appetit, a cooking service for infants and toddlers in Northern California, and the author of The Petit Appetit Cookbook. I never would have blended black beans and yogurt if it wasn't for Barnes.

I recently stumbled upon a great website: NurtureBaby, founded by loving mother, Christen Babb. This site provides healthy, budget-sensitive, simple recipes for busy mommies. Take a minute and stop by.

As a new mom, it's empowering to know that you can make conscious decisions that will impact your child's health and well-being. And yes, sometimes that means packing jarred food. I love this motto: You do the best you can in every situation, and your best always changes. And when all else fails, trust your gut, and your tastebuds.

Experience the Spa at Home *Giveaway*

One month after Liza was born, a friend invited me to her home for some girl bonding.  I didn't really want to go; I couldn't squeeze into anything cute or stylish, and I felt ugly.  Besides, how can you feel good with leaky boobs?  C'mon.  Honestly.

But this girls' night was different than others.  I was encouraged to dress in comfy clothes.  Check.  And the Evite said, "Don't wear makeup."  Check.  It turns out that I had been invited to experience the spa, right in someone's home.  What woman can pass up quality girl time while soaking her feet?  We exfoliated and moisturized with delicious mango and peppermint scents.  And all the while, we laughed, really laughed, about our hairy legs, creeping lines, and imperfections.  It was just what I needed.  

The party was given by Sensaria Representative, ML Banino, who was attracted to the company 3 years ago: "It's a way for mothers to find sanity.  Using high quality, naturally-based spa products provides a daily ritual that helps moms feel better."  

We all deserve to feel beautiful and whole.  That's why this month I am giving away Sensaria's Beach Scent Bundle (pictured below), a $60 value.  And, it's just in time for Mother's Day!   All you need to do is send a comment before April 30 for a chance to win.  The winner will be randomly selected using Random.org.  Good luck!